When to Answer a Question

Recently I was asked about how I decide whether or not to answer a question. The other person commented on my tendency to answer a question with another question, but also noticed that I could give helpful responses. After thinking for a moment, I said that I try to answer honest questions.

I believe that when I am asking an honest question, it is a question that I do not know the answer to before I ask. While that seems like the only reason to ask a question, it is not. For instance, if someone were to ask me, “Which political party is best at running the country?” I do not think that it would be an honest question. When asked this question, I might respond with something like, “What prompted this question today?” It would be hard to find a person who would bring up the topic of politics and not have an opinion of which party is best. It doesn’t mean I would not want to talk to the questioner, but there is probably more to the question, so my question allows me to get more context for what I am being asked. My answer would only get in the way of a helpful conversation.

Sometimes I might have someone double down on the question, “No really - which political party is best at running the country? I want to know what you think.” To this, I would probably double down on my response, “Well, my opinion will not have much determination as to who runs our country, and I’m not sure that you have the power to influence our country’s leadership, so I’m just curious about where this question is coming from!”

While I do not advocate avoiding questions, I encourage people to consider whether it would be more helpful to answer the question or more helpful to answer the question behind it. If you would like to spend time considering such questions, please Contact Us.